Out of the Box

Getting creative with Christianity, crafting, cooking, copious usage of alliteration, and the rest of my life

*insert famous Terminator line here* October 10, 2010

Crazy how life can get so busy. Speaking of which, I should be either sleeping or college-apping right now, but who cares about common sense? 😛

In my long absence, I have knitted a hat (very purple and only slightly misshapen), learned to cable stitch, made play-dough, failed epically at creative methods of gift delivery, and discovered that I can make bagels and pita with the same dough I’ve been using to make bread. Yum – to the last part, that is; yarn doesn’t taste that great, but hey, no need to take my word for it. With enough hot fudge topping, who knows what could happen? DELETE. 😛

Also, love, or at least the uncontrollable insanity we tend to call by that name, all too often means putting the other person’s happiness first. Sometimes this is enjoyable, sometimes not. But if you’re not willing to do it anyway, then… well, what kind of love is it if you’re more worried about yourself?

Also #2, life is confusing. I’m not sure how much of this is adolescence and how much of it is going to follow me into adulthood.

Is happiness just a front, just something to cover the underlying problems that don’t go away?…

No. Somehow the two manage to coexist; it makes neither aspect less real. And life is a beautiful and dysfunctional thing all at the same time. I have no idea how this works, but if it made sense it would be much less interesting.

I wouldn’t change any of it. I’ll come out of it stronger and wiser… I hope.

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Great, another crappy situation August 7, 2010

Filed under: Adventures at Home — Grace @ 1:00 pm

So being home hasn’t been the relaxing time I wish it could be. I’m trying to work on my summer service project, which I have to complete if I want to be able to go back to school, and it’s not going well. As if it wasn’t hard enough motivating myself to do the work, my youngest sister has decided to try to sabotage me. She doesn’t want me to go back to school and is doing her best to make sure I can’t.

So I thought, “Hey, if my sister keeps interrupting me during the day, I’ll just stay up late and work when she won’t bother me.” Well, so much for that theory. It’s after 3 AM and she’s knocking on my door and won’t go away.

So what do I do? I can A) let her sleep up here with me, like she wants, which would make my dad mad at her, B) try to reason with her and get her to go downstairs, which I tried – it didn’t work, C) ignore her, which I’m currently trying to do and which makes me feel like a jerk, D) well, you tell me.

Update: I wrote this at about 3 last night, but didn’t get to post it, because someone turned off our internet router. I thought it was my dad, so I didn’t go turn it back on. Just now I found out that it wasn’t my dad after all. Turns out it was my sister. I lost hours that I could have used to work because I had no internet to do my research.

At school this doesn’t happen. At school no one repeatedly keeps bugging me when they know I have important work to do. Hey, while we’re on this subject, at school I don’t have to listen to constant fighting; at school the people in charge aren’t constantly doing their best to inflict emotional damage on everyone within reach; at school I’m more likely to be able to do something if there’s an unpleasant situation. Of course, at school I’m generally overworked and sleep-deprived, but it’s worth it, both for the superior education I’ll get there, the opportunities I wouldn’t have anywhere else… and the escape.

Of course, it’s pretty pointless for me to long for school when it’s looking more and more possible that I’ll get kicked out for not completing my summer work. Thanks, sis. (And thanks, things-that-come-up-whenever-I-really-need-to-work. And thanks, laziness. And thanks, all-possible-forms-of-exhaustion-combined.)

…No. There’s no way I’m going to let anyone take away one of the best things that’s ever happened to me. I’ll get this done.

Somehow…

 

Home again, home again August 1, 2010

Filed under: Adventures at Home,Adventures in Toronto — Grace @ 11:38 pm

This is belated, since I got home on Tuesday. But oh well.

This seems to have been the summer of transportation issues. First the subway incidents, and then my plane ticket sends me to the wrong gate (or, more likely, the gate changed and I should have been watching the TV screen, but hey, I’m new to this) and I finally realize what’s happening and get to the right gate five minutes before the plane is supposed to leave. It was a really close call. But it all worked out.

As the plane got close to Raleigh and started descending, I was struck by the contrast. The view of Toronto from the plane had been almost all buildings (and Lake Ontario). The view of Raleigh from the plane had so many trees. It looked much more like home. 😛

That was Tuesday afternoon. Visitation Tuesday night. Funeral Wednesday afternoon. After that, not much.

I have nothing else to write that won’t depress me and you.

To come eventually: Maybe some thoughts on camp. Maybe some thoughts on the summer in general. Maybe just some depressed rambling after all, as if I can’t do enough of that inside my head.